Dealing with Small Minds (help)

I've read some posts from my LJ friends regarding what appears to be a turn our country has taken. 

Primarily what I feel is over-the-top intolerence and scorn, from what is becoming a substantial section of our society, directed in various areas:

The financially disadvantaged (employed or unemployed)

People of middle eastern descent (whether they are of the Muslim faith or not)

Gay folks who want to marry

President Obama

I usually just roll my eyes when I experience this behavior on news sites and radio/tv; however, I find that I'm deeply affected when friends and family display this mindset. 

Some in my immediate family (father/brother) are virtually rabid when it comes to attacking Obama and liberals - and they seem to agree with the entire Palin/Limbaugh ideals.  I'm much more hurt by this than annoyed.  These people are my blood relatives - how is it that I'm related. How is it that I didn't notice this while I was being raised in the same house until for all those years?

Family hurts - maybe because I have no choice but to love them regardless.... I don't know.

Friends and in-laws are another story.  I'm trying to find a way to tolerate it from them (since isn't the lesson TOLERANCE....haha) - but honestly - my gut instinct is to toss them aside.  I have no patience for this type of thinking from anyone who I don't have to tolerate it from.  I need help with this because I can see it becoming an issue in the near future - and I don't want my husband to have to be in the middle should I decide to write off mutual friends or in-laws.

If anyone has some words of wisdom - I'm listening.