Christian Sunday School Bloopers.......

1. IN  THE FIRST BOOK OF THE BIBLE, GUINESSIS.  GOD GOT TIRED OF CREATING  THE WORLD SO HE TOOK THE SABBATH  OFF.    

2.   ADAM AND EVE WERE CREATED FROM AN APPLE TREE. NOAH'S WIFE WAS  JOAN  OF ARK. NOAH BUILT AND  ARK  AND THE ANIMALS CAME ON IN  PEARS.  

3.  LOTS WIFE WAS A PILLAR OF SALT  DURING THE DAY, BUT A BALL OF FIRE  DURING THE NIGHT  
  
4.  THE JEWS WERE A PROUD  PEOPLE AND THROUGHOUT HISTORY THEY HAD  TROUBLE WITH  UNSYMPATHETIC GENITALS.   

5.   SAMPSON WAS A STRONGMAN WHO LET HIMSELF BE LED ASTRAY BY A  JEZEBEL  LIKE DELILAH. 

6.   SAMSON SLAYED THE PHILISTINES WITH THE AXE OF THE APOSTLES.   
  
7. MOSES LED THE  JEWS TO  THE  RED   SEA  ! WHERE THEY MADE UNLEAVENED BREAD WHICH IS BREAD   WITHOUT ANY INGREDIENTS.    
 
8. THE EGYPTIANS  WERE ALL DROWNED IN THE DESSERT.  AFTERWARDS, MOSES WENT UP TO  MOUNT   CYANIDE  TO GET THE TEN  COMMANDMENTS 

9.  THE FIRST COMMANDMENTS WAS WHEN EVE TOLD  ADAM TO EAT THE  APPLE.   
 
10.   THE SEVENTH COMMANDMENT IS THOU SHALT NOT ADMIT ADULTERY.    
    
11..   MOSES DIED BEFORE HE EVER REACHED  CANADA  THEN JOSHUA LED THE   HEBREWS IN THE      BATTLE   OF GERITOL.   
 
12.   THE GREATEST MIRICLE IN THE BIBLE IS WHEN JOSHUA TOLD HIS SON  TO  STAND STILL AND HE OBEYED HIM..   
 
13.  DAVID WAS A HEBREW KING WHO WAS SKILLED  AT PLAYING THE LIAR. HE  FOUGHT THE FINKELSTEINS, A RACE OF  PEOPLE WHO LIVED IN BIBLICAL  TIMES.   



14.  SOLOMON, ONE OF DAVIDS SONS, HAD  300 WIVES AND 700 PORCUPINES.  



15.  WHEN MARY HEARD SHE WAS THE MOTHER OF JESUS,  SHE SANG THE MAGNA  CARTA... 


  16.  WHEN THE THREE WISE GUYS FROM THE  EAST SIDE ARRIVED THEY FOUND  JESUS IN THE MANAGER.  



17.  JESUS WAS BORN BECAUSE MARY HAD AN  IMMACULATE CONTRAPTION.  



18.     ST. JOHN  THE BLACKSMITH DUMPED WATER ON HIS HEAD.   

19.  JESUS ENUNCIATED THE GOLDEN RULE, WHICH SAYS TO DO  UNTO OTHERS  BEFORE THEY DO ONE TO YOU. HE ALSO EXPLAINED A MAN  DOTH NOT LIVE  BY SWEAT ALONE.    



20.  IT WAS A MIRICLE WHEN JESUS  ROSE FROM THE DEAD AND MANAGED TO GET  THE  TOMBSTONE  OFF THE  ENTRANCE. 

21.  THE PEOPLE WHO FOLLOWED THE LORD WERE CALLED THE 12   DECIBELS.  
    
22.  THE EPISTELS WERE  THE WIVES OF THE APOSTLES.    
 
23.   ONE OF THE OPPOSSUMS WAS ST. MATTHEW WHO WAS ALSO A   TAXIMAN.   



24     ST. PAUL  CAVORTED TO CHRISTIANITY, HE PREACHED HOLY ACRIMONY  WHICH  IS ANOTHER NAME FOR MARRIAGE. 

25.  CHRISTIANS  HAVE ONLY ONE SPOUSE. THIS IS CALLED  MONOTONY. 

Perimenopause

I think it's begun.....................

Over the past 6 months it's kind of creeped up on me.  The individual symptoms were so subtle - I didn't put two and two together.  Marcel was the one who mentioned the possiblity, and I was like "Oh?....Oh....Ohhhhh!!!! Yeah, I see how it could be that".

I have a doctors appointment for a yearly checkup tomorrow, and I'll ask him for help.  Mostly to see what I can do about the mood swings and melancholy episodes - those have really been throwing me for a loop.  Might not mind going to a therapist if I can afford it - I have some personal issues I'd like some professional help with anyway (nothing serious - mostly putting things in perspective type of stuff).

http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/perimenopause/DS00554/METHOD=print&DSECTION=all

So exciting - I'm entering a new period of my life!
(speaking of periods..... will be overjoyed not to have those anymore - been looking forward to that for a LONG time) :-)